Poet Interview: Mariam
“Mariam is my hypothetical therapist. She listens to everything I say and takes notes. The most important things I say, she turns into poetry.”
Michaela Dengg started writing poetry in 2015. In 2019, she started publishing poems on Instagram under the pseudonym ‘Mariam,’ a combination of her first and middle name. Her poetry frequently deals with the concept of ‘home’ and ‘home far away from home’. She usually writes short poems and aphorisms with powerful wordplays.
When did you become a poet? How did you know it was the right medium for your stories?
I started writing poetry in 2015 during my study abroad year in the US. I had all these new feelings, impressions, and experiences (good and bad) that I wanted to immortalize and poetry felt the right medium to do that. I didn’t know what outlet I needed until I found these emotions in other poets’ poetry. That’s when I started writing poetry myself. I had journaled before, but it never seemed to quite catch the moment, the feelings at the moment. Poetry didn't tell the story of what happened that day, but it told my feelings and emotions.
What inspires you to write, and why?
Emotions, usually the negative ones. When I write my sorrows and worries into a poem, they tend to lessen their grip over me. It's the kind of poetry I appreciate from others as well. Good poetry to me is when it makes me feel seen and not alone. I think I can say that poetry is my therapy. I can process all these feelings and emotions inside me that I don't seem to have words for in everyday life. When I write, it's like I'm talking to a therapist who is excellent with words. Mariam is my wordsmith therapist.
Who are some of your literary or artistic crushes or influences, and why?
My favourite author has nothing to do with poetry. It’s actually Stephen King. I have read every single one of his books and fell in love with his writing style. I’m not a fan of horror per se, but his writing style resonates with me so much. It’s how I see the world. Whenever I read his books, I feel like I'm in his characters' heads. I can feel their emotions, hear their thoughts. Stephen King may write about horror, but he writes about the way people think and feel. At least, how I think and feel.
What are you currently reading and is it a good read or not, why?
I’m currently reading “All About Love” by Bell Hooks and highly recommend it to anyone who wants to learn more about love (and not just the romantic kind). I guess you can say it's sort of a self-help book but in a more philosophical way rather. It taught me so much about all the relationships in my life and how love is in all of them, which is something that I never thought of before. I think the biggest takeaway for me is that we need to learn how to love.
What are you working on next/what was your last project, and can you tell us a little about it?
I’m currently typing out all of my poems on a typewriter for my very first own publication. I love the font of my typewriter, and it makes me feel like I'm a true writer. It also forces me to focus because it is very difficult, and you're not allowed to make mistakes. Most of my poems revolve around the concept of home and home far away from home. I've also written a lot of poems about the pandemic and how that shifted our understanding of home. Home is the umbrella topic of the book, and I'm grouping them under different topics related to home in each chapter, so that they tell a story. Impostor syndrome and thoughts and feelings of not being good enough have prevented me from publishing so far. They still do, but I’m consistently fighting them and getting closer and closer to my goal each day. Baby steps.
What are some common themes you see in your own work, and can you tell us why these themes keep reappearing?
Home and home, far away from home. I have never felt quite at home anywhere, and am still in search of this infamous place called “Home”. I am originally from Germany but have since moved to the United States. I love my home, but I always felt like the odd one out. When I studied abroad in the US, this feeling of being the odd one out suddenly went away, and that is why I came back. I fell like I belong here. There's more than just one home. It can be the place you grew up in, but also the place you choose to live in.
Do you feel that sharing your poetry is a vulnerable process, and why do you feel that way?
I absolutely do. That’s the reason I write under a pseudonym. Writing poetry is freeing for me, but I’m afraid I might hurt others along the way. I share my poetry with a select few people in my personal life, and they read my work regularly. It’s kind of a bittersweet thing, because I’m so glad they read and like them, but at the same time I definitely think about them when I publish, and I wonder if that hinders my creativity and honesty sometimes.
What is the first book that made you cry, and why?
IN-Qs “Inquire within” has poems that I truly think are about me because of how they make me tear up every time I read them. He combines every day topics with a more classic style of poetry by rhyming them, which I never thought you could do and still make it sound like you're having an everyday conversation.
Do you take poetry classes or read books on poetry, and why (not)?
Not yet, but I would love to! I recently moved and there was not much of a poetry scene in my previous town, and then COVID happened. I’m excited to try them in the future.I think my writing style right now is a little all over the place, although I do navigate towards shorter poems with word plays. I think everyone can be a poet, and it doesn't need to be taught. If poetry is therapy and makes you feel better, pick up a pen and just write. There are no rules. Write what makes you feel good.
What is your writing process like?
When inspiration strikes, I typically take notes on my phone. On some days, I can feel the creative juices flowing and that’s when I go to a coffee shop with a notebook and just write my heart out. I usually just write down my poems and then only check for spelling and grammar. I love poetry in its rawest form.